Life as a Writer

Updated July 17, 2018; originally published January 6, 2009

PROMISE ME that when I tell you about my life as a writer, you will NOT pitch this great new book idea that you think I should write and split the profits with you. PROMISE!!! It’s that kind of reaction that makes writers lie about their work.

Stranger: So what kind of work do you do?

Me: I’m a ... uh ... er ... um ... telemarketer; yeah, that’s it! You wanna buy—

Stranger: No, thank you! (walks quickly away)

Me: (wiping brow) Whew! Dodged another one!

I'm not the famous kind of writer, a la Nicholas Sparks or John Grisham. (They don't want your book idea either; trust me. You are going to have to write that baby yourself.) For nearly 9 years, I wrote every week and received a regular direct deposit, and I didn't have to tour the country promoting my work on TV and radio or in autograph sessions. I wrote educational materials for grades K5 through high school, anything from nonfiction articles to scripts to poetry, all with an educational bent. I also edited other writers' work there. I loved that job, and it enabled me to buy a house in the fall of 2007. The only downside to that particular job was the entrance of a harshly critical editor who was ... less than honest, let's say. (I left that job to become a book editor for a local publishing house.)

I also accepted assignments from Union Gospel Press. Specifically, my niche was sets of 13 fictional short stories to be used in Sunday school take-home papers for children ages 9-11. They were published in quarterly format, thus the need for 13 stories. It usually took me three months to complete a set of stories. I also wrote poetry for one of their adult publications. Payment came in a lump sum a month or two after completion. I couldn't make a living from those assignments, but they allowed me to collect a nice bonus a few times a year. When they re-vamped their publications, I took a break from writing, but I hope to get back to it soon.

For a while I had a monthly grammar tips column in a secretarial e-newsletter, but I let that go due to time constraints. I also had a sporadically/monthly homeschool column for Christian Online Magazine from 1999 - 2010, I think it was. Again, time constraints sometimes left me with nothing for the month.

I self-published a book in 2006 before I appeared as a guest speaker at a South Carolina homeschool convention. Confessions of a Single Parent Homeschooler was part personal testimony and part homeschool survival tips. This book had practical encouragement and suggestions for ALL homeschooling families, with special uplifts for single parents. I began homeschooling in 1997, and from 1999 as a single parent, so I had plenty of material.

I also have an unpublished mystery, so if you're an agent or publisher looking for a great new mystery author, you found me! LOL! I called my book Corpse in the Courtyard: a Covert Caper or something like that. The manuscript is around here somewhere ... I haven't looked at it in ages. I went to two mystery writers conventions years ago and had a great time, but I didn't get any great leads. Furthermore, finding an agent or publishing house willing to so much as read a synopsis is like finding a goldmine in my deep freeze. (So far, nothing but ice!) Nicholas Sparks got a boat load of rejections before someone finally read The Notebook and decided to give him a chance. Maybe I gave up too soon ...

I just think it's incredible that I get pitches for stories people would like me to write—after I've explained that my background was writing educational materials for children. One fellow told me I could set that stuff (that paid my bills) aside and work on preserving history—at no pay until the thing sold, mind you. I have enough ideas of my own, thank you, and I have no desire to write anyone's biography or the history of the North Carolina mountain people. Seriously. It's not my thing. Besides, I NEED to collect paychecks in order to keep my house, eat, simple things like that. You understand.

These days my focus is more on editing. I edit everything from children's picture books to murder mysteries, Christian romance, inspirational books, and more. Even cookbooks! It's so rewarding to help authors polish their manuscripts and see them go to print.

I often work seven days a week, but I do have a life outside of writing and editing. Photography is another passion of mine, and it's one that my daughter also shares. I enjoy reading, sightseeing, decorating for holidays, and visiting with friends. But I've got to keep working! Paywork is the #1 priority of a single parent. Nobody else is going to make that mortgage payment for me, not to mention paying for cable, utilities, food, gasoline, clothing, and dental expenses. Those trips to the beach or mountains don't pay themselves, either!

Speaking of paywork, I hear some story ideas calling out to me. I'd better heed the call before they move on to some other writer and leave me with writer’s block!